Military Jokes and Humor -- The Air Force Vs. The Army

Military Jokes and Humor -- The Air Force Vs. The ArmyMilitary Jokes and Humor The Air Force Vs. The ArmyTheres an Air Force guy driving from McChord to Ft Lewis, and an Army guy driving from Ft Lewis to McChord. In the middle of the night with no other cars on the road they hit each other head on and both cars go flying off in different directions. The Air Force guy manages to climb out of his car and surveys the damage. He looks at his twisted car and says,.....Man, I am really lucky to be alive Likewise the Army guy scrambles out of his car and looks at his wreckage. He too says to himself, ..... I cant believe I survived this wreck The Army guy walks over to the Air Force guy and says,...... Hey man, I think this is a sign from God that we should put away our petty differences and live as friends instead of archrivals The Air Force guy thinks for a moment and says, ...... You know, youre absolutely right We should be friends. Now Im gonna see what else survived this wreck So the Air Force guy pops open his trunk and finds a full, unopened bottle of Jack Daniels. He says to the Army guy, I think this is another sign from God that we should toast to our new found understanding and friendship The Army guy replies, Youre damn right and he grabs the bottle and starts sucking down Jack Daniels. After putting away nearly half the bottle the Army guy hands it back to the Air Force guy and says, Your turn The Air Force guy twists the cap back on the bottle and says, Nahh, I think Ill wait for the cops to show up.

Starting Your Own Sales Business as an Entrepreneur

Starting Your Own ausverkauf Business as an EntrepreneurStarting Your Own Sales Business as an EntrepreneurThere are many reasons why people choose a ausverkauf career. For some, their choices involve choosing a large or small ausverkauf company to work for. Others decide on which industry would best fit their needs and objectives. Still, others, find themselves in abverkauf because they have no other choices and learn to love the freedom and income opportunities that a career in sales affords. But there are those who are confident in their sales skills and have a burning entrepreneurial spirit that would make working for anyone else intolerable. These are the sales entrepreneurs that rely solely on themselves, their passion and their ability to close sales. The Difference Between Being an Independent Rep and Owning Your Own Sales Business Independent sales reps are sales professionals who sell the products or services of a producerbut are not considered employees of the company or companies for whom they sell. In effect, they are often considered 1099 employees. While very similar to Independent Sales Reps, Sales Entrepreneurs differ in what they sell and in the relationships they have with the producer of the product or service sold. Independent Sales Reps agree to the compensation plan that the product/service producer designs while a sales entrepreneur is usually the person who finds a product/service that is marketable, designs a marketing sales approach and forms a partnership that most often includes either a share in the profits or equity in the producing company. In short, a sales entrepreneur takes significantly more risks as he has a vested interest in each step of the product/services lifecycle. Also, an entrepreneur is often someone who has their own product/service who feels what they have is marketable. Instead of trying to sell the product to another company or hiring an independent rep to sell her product, the sales entrepreneur represents herself and sells her product/service. What You Should Prepare for Before Starting Your Own Sales Business Being on your own is not for the faint of heart. These professionals have no one but themselves to rely on for their income and no one to blame for their failures. They need to be extremely strong with their time management skills as well as their networking skills. Being 100% on their own, sales entrepreneurs need to be self-motivated, self-directed, focused and be willing to work long hours and long weeks. This career is certainly not for everyone. In fact, few sales professionals would ever even consider starting a business whose success is entirely on their shoulders. The perceived security of working for someone else or at least representing an established manufacturer is a powerful draw in the uncertain world of sales. The Rewards of Having Your Own Sales Business Ask enough sales professionals about their most pressing issue with their job is and you are certain to hear the company I work for... Their issues will vary but many sales professionals do have issues with their employer. Either the pay is not good enough, their sales manager micromanages, the competition is driving away profit or any other number of complaints. Yet if you ever hear a sales entrepreneur complain about their boss or company, you will know that they are only complaining about themselves. A sales entrepreneur is fully free to make any and all decisions, to make course directions or to try a new strategy. If something is not working, they can change it immediately without seeking the permission of anyone else. While most sales professionals enjoy autonomy and freedom, nothing compares to what a sales entrepreneur experiences on a daily basis. Once an entrepreneur earns success, their profits are not divided up between others. Unless the entrepreneur has employees, every cent they earn, they keep. Certainly, not everyone is successful when going on their own, but many are. And those that realize only moderate success are generally more satisfied with their occupations than others. The funny thing about those who become a sales entrepreneur is that even though they may fail and have to find employment with an established business, it usually isnt too long before they are out on their own again, chasing success on their terms.

The average American has less than half an hour of free time per week

The average American has less than half an hour of free time per weekThe average American has less than half an hour of free time per weekAccording to a survey conducted on 2,000 individuals by Onepoll on behalf of HR Block, 59% of Americans find it extremely difficult to balance work and their personal schedules.In fact, the average participant claimed to be so busy they only get about 26 minutes of free time a week. This leads to one and five US workers disregarding their non-professional objectives.Follow Ladders on FlipboardFollow Ladders magazines on Flipboard covering Happiness, Productivity, Job Satisfaction, Neuroscience, and moreWhen it comes to balancing the respondents of the survey disclosed that they are currently putting off 14 things on their to-do lists. More grimly, roughly one and four bemoaned being too preoccupied with work to make regular doctor appointments and about half of those that file their own taxes outed their hectic schedule as the reason they wont this year.The greater majority of the individuals surveyed admitted to ignoring more intimate and less crucial everyday tasks. The most popular life administrative tasks that are collectively being put off by Americans are as followsCleaning 47.86%Household maintenance/repairs 39.55%Laundry 38.32%Shopping 32.72%Going to the gym 31.67%Making appointments (doctor, etc.) 27.03%Cook 25.98%Car maintenance 25.63%Going to the bank 22.92%Paying bills 18.20%Ladders has reported on the pervasive obsession with overwork thats plaguing America on several occasions, in addition to the fiscal and productivity benefits of enjoying time off within in reason.Psychology.com reports that of the meager 45% of Americans that actually utilize their paid vacation days, 41% of them spend a good chunk of that time checking into work while they are away.As Joe Robison of Work to Live states Humans are energy machines. We expend energy over the course of the workday and work year in our body and brains (which use up 20% of the bodys calories), and then we have to replace it, or fatigue sets in, stress and exhaustion build, and productivity plummets.This policy of self-care can be enacted in the immediate even if you arent currently eligible for a paid extended retreat. Even the simple act of viewing your weekend like a mini vacation has been shown to boosts mood and productivity immensely.One important task that many Americans also feel they dont have enough time for is doing their taxes. Over 50% of respondents answered yes to the following question I feel like I dont have time to do my taxes this year compared to 33% of people who disagreed.People were then asked about what leisure items or treats they intend on buying with any tax refund money. Some of the more interesting responses includedMotorcycle tiresPlayStation 4Trip to casinoNiagara Falls tripA partyLawnmowerFreedom from credit card companiesPizzaScooterScuba gearCheck out the infographic below for more findings from the survey.Y ou might also enjoyNew neuroscience reveals 4 rituals that will make you happyStrangers know your social class in the first seven words you say, study finds10 lessons from Benjamin Franklins daily schedule that will double your productivityThe worst mistakes you can make in an interview, according to 12 CEOs10 habits of mentally strong people

Do Your Employees Want Career Development Maybe You Should Send Them Out of the Country

Do Your Employees Want Career Development Maybe You Should Send Them Out of the Country Do Your Employees Want Career Development Maybe You Should Send Them Out of the Country Forbes contributor Alan Hall (linked above) notes that the reasons for this unhappiness are rarely tied to money or benefits 31 percent of employees were unhappy because they felt they lacked empowerment 35 percent were unhappy with internal politics and 43 percent felt they did not receive proper recognition.In short employees really care about opportunities for personal development and professional growth. If talent doesnt find these things at your company, they become disengaged, and youll quickly lose them to employers who do offer these things.Millennials are especially interested in training and development opportunities, and theyre more than willing to jump ship if theyre dissatisfied as weve noted in the past. As increasing numbers of millennials join the workforce, more and more companies will need to offer enticing professional and personal development opportunities or watch as high-level talent passes them by for the organizations who do.Kyle Borchardt, chief operating officer of leadership training firm Virtuali, says that thinking about the reasons why employees leave is what helped his company create Go, a professional development program he describes as study abroad meets geschftliches miteinander school meets full time job.We really took a step back to understand and evaluate what is wrong with the business environment today, with regard to the high levels of disengagement and the high levels of attrition, especially amongst millennials, Borchardt says.Part of the problem, Borchardt says, is that employers dont fully understand what millennials want and need out of their jobs. While stereotypes cast millennials as needy or entitled, Borchardt believes that millennials simply respond to a different style of leadership. As opposed to just managing millennials, you need t o lead millennials, he says. Millennials want developmental experiences. They want to be constantly learning on the job.With an emphasis on the experiential side of professional development, Virtualis Go is a far cry from the team-building exercises and dull, day-long conferences that spring to mind when one thinks of P.D. Consider, for example, that Go is currently the only leadership development program that allows participants to live abroad while continuing to work their jobs.The Program in a NutshellBorchardt explains that Go is not meant to be a one-off program, something that companies do once and never again. Our ideal client would be someone that we partner with, he says, We really want to become a part of their overall talent strategy.For example, Borchardt sees Go as a good addition to any Fortune 500s rotational program for emerging talent. Wed ideally like to be incorporated into that rotation, or the capstone of that rotational program, he says.The Go program comprises four modules which all participants completeModule one is a leadership assessment that aims to help participants discover their individual leadership styles (or leadership brands) through self-assessment, one-on-one coaching and 360-degree feedback from leaders, subordinates, and peers.Module two focuses on virtual team leadership. Borchardt describes it as a 3-4 week project simulation that is a cocktail of live webinars and classes, and then a hands-on simulation. In the simulation portion, teams work together to solve business cases using only virtual means of communication.Module three is where Go really differentiates itself from other professional development programs, as participants spend 15, 30, or 45 days studying abroad at Virtualis Buenos Aires campus while continuing to work their full-time jobs. Similar to a nights and weekends MBA program, our studienplan is a combination of MBA courses, hands-on business practicums, leadership development activities, a number of cul tural activities, a speaker series, and networking events, Borchardt says. Its really this very immersive experience that broadens your view on global business, and it teaches you how to lead and manage a virtual and a global team. You really come back feeling much more fluent working cross-culturally.Module four is an alumni program, which allows graduates of the Go program to access opportunities and resources for continuing development.Borchardt says that the program aims to meet the multiple desires of millennial employees, mixing their taste for learning and development with their passion for travel and their experiences in a globalized culture.Our curriculum is based on the three pillars of personal and professional development, global experience, and flexible work, Borchardt says. I think more and more millennials really want to have a balance between their work and their personal life, and obviously as technology changes the way we work, theres a huge skills gap that exists. Technology has evolved so rapidly, and the human component has not. People dont know how to manage a team remotely or virtually. They dont know how to work with people across different time zones.The Study Abroad Approach to Professional DevelopmentLike a college study abroad program, in which students spend time away from their schools while still completing coursework, the Go program sends participants off to Buenos Aires while allowing them to continue working their full-time jobs. Because participants work throughout the entirety of the program, their development occurs on the job and can be applied in real-time, which ultimately results in more effective learning, Borchardt explains. That will ultimately translate to stronger leaders and greater performance.Part of the allure of study abroad programs is that they allow students to meet and mix with new people from new walks of life. Borchardt says that Go offers a similar opportunity. Go participants have the opportunity to ex perience to people of Buenos Aires, but it should also be noted that the program itself brings together professionals from a variety of careers and industries. We really like the cross pollination of having individuals from different companies working together. You might have a first-time manager from a Fortune 500 company paired with the director of a startup, Borchardt says. Maybe the industries overlap, maybe they dont, but I think having that cross-pollination of individuals working together is paramount in terms of experience, development, networking, and building a broader understanding of how different people work in different environments.By asking participants to work their full-time jobs while living in Buenos Aires, Go hopes to help employees learn how to work within the flexible, globalized workforce, in which people may regularly collaborate across borders and time zones. You understand who you are as a leader, and then you learn how to lead and manage a virtual team, a nd then you actually get to apply those skills in real time from an international location, Borchardt says.Before settling on Buenos Aires, Borchardt conducted a full analysis of about 40 cities, taking into account things like safety, cost of living, and the language. Buenos Aires met all of the criteria and also offered a valuable sex appeal, Borchardt jokes. Known as the Paris of South America, Buenos Aires offered participants an exciting location in which to develop their leadership abroad.Go aligns with the top benefits that emerging leaders are looking for, which are professional development, flexibility, and international experience, Borchardt says. He believes that offering these things leads to engaged leaders, higher productivity, stronger culture, better recruitment, and better retention.The real strength of our program is the combination of all that, Borchardt says. Not only will we develop your future leaders at a critical juncture in their career, well also ensure tha t the individuals themselves remain productive and engaged and ultimately loyal.Expansion PlansFor now, Go only has one international campus (in, as weve mentioned, Buenos Aires). However, Borchardt says it will not be that way forever. Our 3-5 year plan is to expand to 4-6 new markets, he says. Our ideal situation would be that we have one campus on almost every continent.Aside from expanding globally, Go is also looking to expand technologically. Virtuali plans on instituting a platform that allows participants to access trainings, teachings, and other resources from their mobile devices. That would include everything from the courses we currently have to some language learning tools, so when youre abroad you can just tap your phone when you need to learn a common phrase or communicate with someone, Borchardt explains.Go is certainly an interesting spin on the idea of professional development, designed to quench multiple employee thirsts while keeping them loyal to their employers . After all, how easy could it be the ditch the company that let you to live in Buenos Aires for a while? Go may be a blueprint for companies looking to attract top talent in the future. Its no longer all about paychecks, but exciting, invigorating development opportunities.

What Everybody Dislikes About Computer Skills Resume and Why

What Everybody Dislikes About Computer Skills Resume and Why Furthermore, include any computer software which you are skilled in specific to the possible job opening. Just make certain you speak with a person in your IT department if youre still a little unsure of the fundamental computer skills in regards to IT security. For instance, if you designed a computer system that made it a lot easier to network with different departments at your organization, list that experience. You may often find both systems on computers at your regional library, though you might also be in a position to learn on the work too. Ideas, Formulas and Shortcuts for Computer Skills Resume Becoming able to receive a message out into the world effectively and efficiently using social media is quite a handy skill to get, particularly now when so lots of people use social media among their primary sources of information. Social networking skills too are exceptionally essential in the present workplace. The awesome thing about its that all these folks still dont have the suitable social media skills to create the the majority of their engagements online. Back in the old times of the web, only someone with big-time tech skills could update a site. Finding Computer Skills Resume Online If you would like to do something more than write a simple text document, you will require a more effective program like Microsoft Word. For instance, perhaps you have used Microsoft Word for years, but you need never done a Mail Merge. In addition, it is going to help you show off your very best PC skills effortlessly There are plenty of programs you are able to utilize to create presentations, including PowerPoint, that is the most commonly used software across industries. Everybody can use a computer but not everybody is aware of what information technology is about. If youre applying to a job which involves using tools, note the tools and equipment you understand how to use. Besides basi c computer skills, you will be expected to swiftly master HIT-specific programs like a master patient index, which holds all of the information for every single patient registered to a distinct medical facility. In case you have knowledge, blogging is just one of the very best ways to share this, and also to let prospective employers understand the value you could bring them. With many individuals applying for the exact position, it is essential to comprehend what employers wish to binnensee on a resume. Every word you are using in your resume must grab the interest of a possible employer. Minimum skills are essential to work an assembly line, increasing the range of prospective employees a business could hire. The Downside Risk of Computer Skills Resume Highlighting your problem-solving skills on a resume wont go unnoticed if youve got the ideal qualifications for employment. Below, you are going to discover more info about the kind of computer skills employers commonly se arch for in job applicants. If youre applying into a role for the very first time, do a research in the commonest technologies being used in that region, and make an attempt at learning some or all of them by yourself. For example, if youre asking for a tech job, you dont wish to outline all your basic computer abilities. Stress which you have excellent or robust communication skills rather than simply communication abilities. If you arent fully fluent in another language make certain you rank your fluency level and offer the scale youre using. Hardware skills enable you to physically operate a computer. Workers have to have the ability to easily learn to use a range of hand tools. Lets take a good look at the skills you demand. Different soft abilities or non-tech skills might also be required. Now you know the HIT-related skills employers are seeking, it will be simple to figure out whether youre learning the skills in demand in the business. When you know which in-dem and skills you currently have, you can find out what to learn next to get prepared for the work industry. Instead, youre highlight relevant abilities and achievements from previous work in the neatly-aligned bullet points. You dont have the fundamental computer skills you will need to acquire the job that you desire. Computer Skills Resume and Computer Skills Resume - The Perfect Combination No matter your degree of job practical expertise, your resume structure is essential to making your application stick out. This computer skills are astoundingly valuable at this time across a wide variety of industrieswhich means having them on your resume will cause you to be a more attractive job candidate. If you arent really acquainted with a software and its required by means of a work description, be honest and say how much experience youve got. This kind of invaluable software will enable you to conduct some of the most pertinent facets of your teaching duties in a handy and thoro ughly methodological way. Whispered Computer Skills Resume Secrets As soon as youve looked at several such ads within your intended industry, it is going to become more and more clear what hiring managers are looking for (with respect to job skills). A hiring manager will be searching for skills which are the absolute most relevant to the job available. Irrespective of where you include your skills section on your resume, you can be certain that the hiring manager will find it and definitely likely to ask about doing it. After awhile, all the resumes have started to look the exact saatkorn. Whats more important to employers are any particular computer skills that you may have. If you want to upgrade your computer skills or merely learn the fundamentals, Learn Local organisations can provide help. Teachers who want to stay relevant in their given fields must also locate the crucial time to totally grasp the fundamentals of computer networking. Customer support people must h ave problem solving skills, the same as web developers do As you proceed through the list of skills above, make a distinct list with the skills which you already possess. Job skills are an essential part of any resume. Customer service skills should normally be included on an individuals resume. Skills on how best to make your very own dynamic website are critical. Some jobs have a few of primary duties. The sorts of computer skills employers expect will vary depending upon your career or industry. If youre able to do that, an employer will certainly notice. When applying for internships you need to show employers that youve got the experience necessary for the position, and you would like to use the role for an opportunity to garner more skills while assisting the organization in achieving its targets.

The Inside Scoop 3 Tips for Landing a Killer Startup Sales Gig

The Inside Scoop 3 Tips for Landing a Killer Startup Sales Gig I know what youre thinking What person in their right mind would earnestly pursue a schlussverkauf gig at an unproven startup? Its a fair question, but believe it or not, some of the best of the best abverkauf mavericks prefer working for startups over working for larger, mora established businesses.Yes, the financial uncertainty, late nights, and coffee binges are enough to repel droves of qualified salespeople, but working for an up-and-coming startup comes with its own set of unique benefits, too. Here are just a few of them- Startup salespeople often enjoy the benefits of a more light-hearted, laid-back environment.- Startup salespeople are generally given more responsibility. The result? They grow more quickly.- Startup salespeople more fully appreciate hard work, accountability, and self-sustainability.- Startup salespeople work in smaller teams. As such, theyre recognized for their success.- Startup salespeople often have the opportunity to learn from innovative entrepreneurs.See what I mean?Startups arent necessarily the right fit for all salespeople, but for the right candidate, there can be nothing better. So, do you feel like you fit the mold? If so, dont pounce on the first startup offer that comes down the line. Instead, do everything within your power to land a sales position at a company thats worthy of yourtalent.Not koranvershow this is to be done? No worries the followingthree tips willpoint you in the right direction1. Flattery at Its Finest Research the Startup in QuestionYou wouldnt think of making a sales call or showing up at a prospects office without having first researched a decision-makers company, industry, or personal interests, would you?Similarly, before meeting with a startup about a new job, its important to take some time to do research. This can be done in a number of ways- You can conduct a basic Google search to see what can be l earned about the startup in question.- Using the startups website and LinkedIn, see if you can speak with a current employee.- Take to Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram to get a feel for company culture.Financial viability, client history, marketing capabilities, product or service offerings, and alliances theyre all topics worth investigating before you sit down for a one-on-one bewerbungsinterview.This might seem like a lot of work, but its beneficial for a number of reasons. For starters, you dont want to get hired only to soon realize youre not working for a good company. Its sad, but trueThe vast majority of startups will fail, and you dont want to voluntarily board a sinking ship.Next, by having done your due diligence, you increase your chances of impressing a potential employer during theinterview process. Dont expect to get the red carpet treatment for your knowledge, but rest assured that hiring agents (at least the good ones) will always take note.2. Quantify Your Value P ropositionYoure a salesperson, so this shouldnt come as much of a shock to you Sales is a numbers game. Everything you do is quantified to show exactly how valuable you are to an employer.Shoddy salespeople shy away from numbers, making excuses for why theirs arent quite up to snuff. On the flip side of things, industry-leading sales talent embrace numbers, using them to set well-defined goals, push themselves tirelessly, and keep themselves accountable.You might not yet have signed on the dotted line, but to increase the likelihood that an offer is eventually sent your way, quantify your value proposition by talking openly about the numbers your sales career has generated for past employers. In addition, these sorts of numbers should also be highlighted throughout your resume.Hiring a new employee is a risky investment, especially for startups. When you quantify your value proposition with sales metrics and past achievements, you build bonds of trust and confidence between yourself and the startup you hope to work for.3. Be Prepared to Ask Questions That Actually MatterIts an interview. Youre the one in the hot seat why should you have to put more pressure on yourself by stepping into someones office with a mental list of meaningful questions?Well, heres the thing Game-changing salespeople are known for asking clients questions to gain a better understanding of what they need. Once a genuine need has been identified, salespeopleareable to talk about their products or services from a more favorable position.In an interview, when you ask appropriate, yet critical questions, you demonstrate that you possess two of a salespersons finest, most sure-fire tools the ability to ask questions and the ability to listen intently as answers are given.On top of that, by asking questions of substance, you show your interest inthe startup itself.Remember to be sincere with all of this. Boring, run-of-the-mill questions though better than nothing simply wont get the job do ne.Questions like How long have you been in business? and Whats your favorite thing about working here? are certainly not bad questions, but the kinds of startups that attract widespread attention and experience rapid growth will expect more from their sales candidates.(Click here for a list of high-quality questions to ask during an interview with a startup.)The above tips arent anything out of the ordinary. Theyre simple, tried-and-true methods thatve proven helpful to salespeople who hope to join atop-notch startup.The biggest issue, though? While these tips are easy to follow, few are the sales candidates who make the conscious effort to follow through on all three of them. For you, this is good news Cling closely to each one, and youll soon find yourself making sales at the perfect startup.Amy Volas has been a sales fanatic, recruiter, and entrepreneur for 20 years. She is currently the head of Avenue Talent Partners.